Overcoming Fear in Pakistan

fear-in-pakistan-lakeFifteen minutes after the Pakistani pilot prays in Urdu over the intercom system for a safe flight, signifying my plane has taken off from Islamabad, we are flying above the mystical Karakoram mountains. Cumulus and crevice are indistinguishable at this height.

After landing at Skardu airport, one of two airports in what is widely perceived as a dangerous region, I spot my driver, a young, gangly boy. Outside of my window as we drive I see trees a color green I’ve never seen before—it almost glows somehow.

After fifteen kilometers we arrive at my hotel: the Shangri-La. Meadows, streams, lakes, mountains, all seem directly taken from a fairytale. But this paradise is walled in with barbed wire and guarded by Pakistani special forces.

The view spellbinds you so that you lose track of time and the sun slowly slinks behind the crag and you sit, gazing at the luminescent green beauty around until some distant howl—of a wolf perhaps—reminds you of all of the terrors about the Taliban and anti-Americanism that were pumped into you before you got on that bus to Islamabad; reminds you of the quick slip of paper with the Urdu words for “there is only one God and that is Allah and Muhammad is His last messenger” and “Praise be to Allah” written on it, given to you with encouragement to memorize them and speak anything, anything, but English.

Fear is a funny thing. It is sleek and subtle and thick as bricks of smoke around us all the time. It spirits into us from our televisions, from our newspapers, from our computers, and, sometimes, from our friends and family too. And it takes different forms, depending on what we’re supposed to be afraid of.

Pakistan

However, if we have our trust rooted in God, then we will be able to rise above these fears, know their unreality, and move on to the greater work that needs to be done: love. In the Bible, John tells us “Perfect love casteth out fear,” (I John 4:18) and in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures Mary Baker Eddy defines fear as “… ignorance; error.”

My trip to Pakistan was not originally about conquering fear. But as I entered what is considered by many to be a very dangerous region, at least part of my mission became to see how I could overcome the fear that stalked me at every turn.

I was told not to come to Pakistan by multiple Americans for the exact same reasons that I was told not to travel north by Pakistanis: the people who would surround me are dangerous and not to be trusted. During my trip I had to overcome fears of sickness, fears of terrorism, fears of strange culture, fears of the poor, fears of others close to me: the fears of mankind.

Overcoming these fears was not a solo mission, just as my traveling is never really solo because I know that God is always with me. Here’s one example of how God was with me. While I was traveling on the midnight bus from Lahore to Islamabad, I was frightened by statements I’d heard earlier in the day about my safety and the instability of the region I was traveling to.

I was tempted to put on my iPod, turn it up full blast, and isolate myself through bass and snare drums. However, I knew that submerging myself in ignorance was not the way to overcome my fear. When I first came on the bus, I had sat in the back, at least three rows from the closest Muslim.

When I checked my ticket, however, I saw that I had been assigned a seat in the middle of the bus. I scanned the seats and saw only turbans and great big beards (bigger than mine) and steely eyes. Despite my supposed cultural progressiveness, something I’ve touted my whole life, I was afraid to move. I scrunched up in my seat and turned my head to the window.

Not long after I noticed the man next to me was reading a book. Since I am a nosy little literature worm, curiosity emboldened me, and I inched my way into his business and asked him what he was reading.

That was the beginning of a three-hour conversation that spanned nutrition, computers, Pakistani politics, conspiracy theories, Vietnam, God, and the solution to all of Pakistan’s current problems. As if to emphasize the groundlessness of my fears, it turned out that this man was also going to the airport, and he helped me get to the next bus and into a taxi to the airport. A wonderful, and what I would find to be typical, Muslim angel.

Over and over my fears have proved unfounded. Where I’d been told everyone was dangerous, instead, everyone waves to me. I am not prevented from doing anything. And as I overcome the fear of traveling here, I am finding myself totally free. Free to live; free to explore; free to make a change. That is what I came to do; that is what I did while visiting, teaching, and working with several girl’s schools.

Pakistan

In order to overcome fear, however, I needed to be awake and aware of my surroundings—spiritually awake and aware. This is very similar to what Mrs. Eddy says about healing. “In order to heal by Science, you must not be ignorant of the moral and spiritual demands of Science nor disobey them.”

Rather than remain ignorant of Pakistan and Islam, I took it upon myself to replace my ignorance with experience, which opened up the door for Love to enter. Think deeply about what causes fear. What are you afraid of and why? How ridiculous fear is when we think of fear in relation to God as defined by Mary Baker Eddy in Science and Health!

“The great I am; the all-knowing, all-seeing, all-acting, all-wise, all-loving, and eternal; Principle; Mind; Soul; Spirit; Life; Truth; Love; all substance; intelligence.”

Fear only exists when we are ignorant, when we are ignoring the facts about God. Once we realign ourselves with these facts, then fear has no foundation, it becomes unreal.

No matter where in the world I travel, if I truly understand this definition of God there can be no ignorance, but only love for my fellowman—and woman.
by Michael Morgan

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