Real sacrifice

by Megan Shields

I’m Megan Shields and this summer I am working as the production assistant for The Writings of Mary Baker Eddy, the group that handles anything to do with Mrs. Eddy and her writings. I live in the Chicago suburbs, but go to school at Principia College. I am double majoring in Mass Communications and Philosophy, and I also play lacrosse and work for the school newspaper.

The decision to come to The Mother Church for the summer wasn’t too hard to make. My plan to go to camp for the tenth summer in a row fell through and I found myself searching for another way to learn, grow, and wile the summer away. Because I was required to get an internship to graduate, I naturally sought different jobs around the country related to the media and applied to nine different programs, including TMC Youth. I was eager to dive into the buzz and excitement of working in a newsroom or maybe in film and video and other parts of the media, but I knew that God really was at work in my life. No matter where I applied and what my resume looked like, none of it mattered because God is powerful enough to put me in the best place possible.

It was because it seemed so anomalous and surprising not to make the habitual routine trip to camp, it was clear that there was an exciting new experience out there for me. It was easy to get caught up in resume and application writing because it was so tempting to make myself look as attractive and talented as possible.

But when I went to fill out the TMC Youth application, it incited deep and reflective responses. I realized that no matter where I would go or what I would be doing in the coming months, each experience is equal in its ability to bestow infinite blessings, despite what the material package seemed to contain. It became irrelevant that one job offered experience with a highly acclaimed art museum or another offered opportunities to work with filmmakers from around the world. At that point, it was an issue not of what could be most exciting for me, but what would give me the chance to give the most.

And then I came back to one of the most basic lessons of my childhood: unselfishness. As I am inherently tied with God, my human will—no matter how stubborn it may seem sometimes—doesn’t stand a chance against God’s almightiness. I got a deeper sense of unselfishness that goes beyond being kind, sharing with friends, helping other people, volunteering, etc.

What I realized during the process of filling out that TMC Youth application was that unselfishness, first and foremost, is sacrifice. Before, sacrifice meant to me some a way to pay homage to God, to give Him some sort of gift and relinquish something of value as a way to show love for Him. And while that may be part of it, I now feel that sacrifice involves the complete and total acknowledgment of God’s power and of our inability to do anything on our own. It says it perfectly in the Bible, “I can of mine own self do nothing… I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.” By letting go of all my ambitions, goals, needs, and wants, I recognized my own intricate connection to God and the harmony of being, trusting His omnipotent and omniscient nature.

It’s always been challenging for me to let go of my life and let Him direct it. But unselfishness moves the focus from yourself to God, and, as I’ve been told countless times, that is the key element of healing.

While the choice to come to the Boston for the summer was made simply because it was the only one offered, it was tempting to agonize over everything else I was missing. It took a lot of trust an unselfishness to see that this experience would be as purposeful as any other, and that God’s direction could never lead me astray.

Now that I’m here, I try to demonstrate that freedom that comes with sacrifice, with letting God take care of everything.. And I’m worrying less about my goals and dreams and ambitions. It’s such a simple lesson, now that I see it for what it is, but it’s fundamental to the way we practice Christian Science. It’s humility and faith that guide us along, from one summer to the next, from one decision to another. All we have to do is acknowledge God’s might and remember what Mary Baker Eddy wrote in her book, Science and Health, “What we most need is the prayer of fervent desire for growth in grace, expressed in patience, meekness, love, and good deeds.”

This entry was posted on Friday, July 20th, 2007 at 10:37 am and is filed under New Perspective. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response.