by Kim Canuette
I guess I should start with some introductions. I am Kim Canuette from small town North Carolina. I am a junior at North Carolina State University, majoring in History and English. This summer I am an intern in Special Projects for the Reading Rooms. I have been in Boston for about a week and have been having a blast working for the Reading Rooms and getting to meet so many new people. While I live in Raleigh for school, the place that I call home is a small farm in Eastern North Carolina. We moved next door to my grandparents earlier this year so that brings the total on the farm to me, my parents, grandparents, two brothers, five cats, two dogs, a beta fish, and about 60,000 chickens. It’s quite a place!
The largest part of my experience here this first week has been adapting to a new environment. I haven’t really spent much time in major cities. Raleigh is the largest I have ever lived in. So Boston is quite a change. Still, when I came here I felt I could handle the change. That might have been my first mistake — thinking I was the one handling this change by myself—but more about that later. Family members and friends had given me extensive warnings about locking my doors, what to do if someone tried to rob me, and all these other horrible possibilities. I started to think about this entirely too much. I had a horrible case of the “what if’s” and falling asleep at night became a challenge. Every possible fear about being left alone came to mind as I lay there in the dark waiting for sleep to descend. Taking a shower was difficult, too. All I could think of was that scene from Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho,” where you see the shadow of someone with a knife on the shower curtain.
After two nights of this incessant worry, I realized it had to stop. Even though I was fine at work, fear was completely controlling the rest of my time. I didn’t even want to explore my new surroundings because I was so afraid of such a large, unfamiliar city. But the third afternoon I was here, I decided to walk to the Boston Public Garden, which is down the street from where I am living. Of course, I went in the wrong direction, but that was no reason to be discouraged as all I needed to do was turn around. I had decided at this point that my problem was a fear of people; I didn’t trust those around me. This was ridiculous. Mary Baker Eddy writes in Science and Health,
Man is the expression of God’s being. If there ever was a moment when man did not express the divine perfection, then there was a moment when man did not express God, and consequently a time when Deity was unexpressed — that is, without entity.
The people I was seeing as I walked were all expressions of God and as such it was my duty to love them and recognize their spiritual, perfect nature. The same goes for all of those fictitious people that I kept seeing when I closed my eyes to go to sleep. Then I faced the idea I mentioned earlier — that I was dealing with this by myself. I have considered myself a Christian Scientist my entire life and one of my earliest Sunday School lessons was, “There is not a spot where God is not.” It’s a simple, but powerful lesson. How could I forget it? I realized that God was with me everywhere I went. He didn’t stay in Raleigh; He was with me in Boston, as well. And with God’s loving protection, what more did I need? This was all it took to break the spell. I’m not worrying about this business of being alone anymore. On the practical side of things I’ve got locked doors, but better yet, God is always protecting me, so why worry?
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thanks for sharing!
Hey Kim!!
Thats so cool that your going to be helping out with Reading Room. I and 3 other people actually came up with your job description!
Im so excited that you’ll be spending your summer with TMC Youth. I was their from Jan til late April and it was by far the best experience. I worked for TMCYouth, Reading Room ( main place of work) and Sunday School. They put me in the reading room because I love working with people and I was only 10 houses down.
Are you living at Asher House? You can actually read by blogs that I did when i was an intern under “Michael Trevail”
Well… please send my love to the Reading Room staff… their so special in my heart and God bless to you!
With love, Michael Andrew Trevail, Former Community Outreach Intern for TMC Youth, Mother Church Reading Room, and Sunday School Activities!
What an exciting adventure! We have missed you in Sunday School but I thought you were spending the summer in Kinston. Now I know you are putting
Sunday School into practice. Now that we are keeping our RR open on Saturdays I’m trying to come up with some activities that will be attrative to youth. Perhaps you will return will some ideas for us to try.
Have a great summer and we look forward to the return of our Sunday School Wolfpacker.
Looking forward to hearing more about your Boston experiences.
What a wonderful expression of God’s Love for us, Kim. One of the most powerful statements I have learned from Christian Science throughout the years is that one simple statement: “there is not a spot where God is not.” So simple, yet so true. We are so proud of you and excited that you are in Boston. What a wonderful experience for you to be interning at the Mother Church Reading Room! Remember, “God is Love, and whomever dwelleth in God, dwelleth in Love, and God in him.” His Love surrounds you wherever you go. Looking forward to hearing more from you. Have a great summer!
Hi Kim
Your description of your walk to the Public Gardens reminded me of an experience I had once. I was in the waiting lounge of an airport, waiting for my flight to load. I looked around, and it seemed like the people I saw all were expressing opinions, through their dress, that I was not in tune with. I decided I should specifically love everyone there, and identify them as ideas of God, worthy of love. I sat there a while doing this, and suddenly the fellow next to me (I seem to recall he was dressed as a soldier, not one of those I had been concerned about) began to tell me about himself. At first I didn’t understand what he was telling me, but finally I realized he was telling me about his recent experience. He was on his way home, on leave. He had been feeling that his companions were against him, because they were telling him he should not be doing drugs. Then, recently, as he awoke from one such “excursion,” he realized that what they were doing was because they loved him. He had then realized that he did need to go in a different direction. I had Science and Health with me, and so as we talked, I was able to share ideas from it with him. We rode together on the flight, and there was a Reading Room at the destination airport. I took him there, and showed him a Christian Science Journal, and told him about practitioners. He looked in the directory, and found there the mother of a girl he had dated! I felt really good about the encounter as we parted.
So, loving those around us determinedly, can make a difference.
Infinite Mind always transforms fear to faith.
Thank you for sharing the challenge you encountered.
I am currently living in Raleigh originally from Boston. I moved here because I grew up in Boston and found myself living from friends house to friends house *basically homeless*. I love Raleigh but I feel like moving back to Boston now that I am on my feet. I want the opportunity, the lifestyle, the culture, my family and to use all of my talents and make tons of money. I don’t feel like I can do this here and I am missing out on family, I am very lonely in Raleigh. I pray about this everyday on where god wants me to be and I haven’t had a response. What do you think? I need advice! THANKS
Stephanie,
When I first moved to Raleigh, I found that I spent my first two weeks forcing my way through each day feeling physically ill and emotionally depressed. I didn’t want to admit that I was homesick but when I finally did I prayed using this quote from Mary Baker Eddy, “Home is the dearest spot on earth, and it should be the center, though not the boundary of the affections.” I knew that I was loving my family and they loved me no matter where I was and even more importantly God was and continues to love me more dearly than anyone else can. I was able to move forward (away from illness and depression) and form wonderful friendships that will last me a lifetime. No matter where you are God’s love is always present. As for finding your right place, explore your options. If the best place for you is in Boston then a way will unfold for you to return home. If there is something that you need to find in Raleigh, then God will lead you to it. There is something valuable to be gained from every experience that God leads you to. I’ve had experiences that I didn’t see the value of at the time but later they turned into wonderful healings and created valuable opportunities. Just “lean on the sustaining infinite” and your day and life will be filled with blessings. Lovingly, Kim
Kim,
Nice post. You mentioned you went in the “wrong direction’ when going to the Boston Public Garden. Is there really a wrong direction when you are walking with God?
I remember these words from my grandfather and grandmother whenever one of them left the house for any reason. “God directed, God protected”.