by Holly Henneberger
My journey with Christian Science has been a whirlwind these last few months. I’ve grown up in the church and have been faithful to it. And since coming to college, I feel my spiritual understanding flourished.
But then for the last few months, I’d experienced a so called “slump” in my enthusiasm for Christian Science. I couldn’t figure out where this feeling was coming from. Before this, I really wanted to grow and strengthen my spiritual awareness more and more.
As I thought about it, I was able to trace these inexplicable feelings to anxiety about sharing my Christian Science beliefs with others. It was an insecurity I had always tried to tackle, but had never fully mastered. I prayed for a resolution, whatever it might be. I knew I wanted to continue to grow in the direction I’d been heading in and I felt sure that God would provide a path that matched that desire.
One of my favorite verses from Psalms inspired me as I worked through this. It says, “Lord, thou has heard the desire of the humble and thou wilt prepare their heart, thou wilt cause thy ear to hear.” I felt that God was listening to me and would make me receptive to inspiration. He’d direct me to the right path for my own spiritual growth in Christian Science. With a thankful heart, I awaited the direction I knew I would get from God.
I am attending Texas A&M University and since arriving here, I have been very involved with our CSO. We have an incredibly strong group, and last year we decided to invite other college-aged Christian Scientists in Texas to come together for a weekend of discussions about college related issues—and best of all, bonding time! Last year was such a success that we knew another round was definite. Being more comfortable with the set-up, we all felt able to delve deeper spiritually than we had the year before. With each of us leading a discussion, we had our share of homework.
I had agreed to lead the ‘Relationship’ talk. Although I felt I had come up with many inspirational points, I was worried I wouldn’t have the right thing to say during the discussion group. Truth be told, I had actually been slightly reluctant about not just my talk, but the entire weekend. It may seem weird, but I wasn’t even very excited about my favorite activity in CSO!
The weekend finally arrived, and right from the start, I began to forget all of the stresses that I’d been feeling. The first night was full of fun! We played game after game. I felt like there was a strong sense of peace and harmony, and not just in me, but in everyone.
The next day, the discussions went incredibly smoothly, with such solid and open thoughts that I felt inspired, motivated, and uplifted. We were inside talking the whole day, but the time went by so quickly that I never felt tired. As I mentioned before, I had been worried about my discussion topic, but now I knew that whatever came from my mouth would be directly from God. I felt like everyone else in the discussion would feel the same connection to God, too. And they did! Every little fear I had felt about the weekend beforehand was, in fact, meaningless. That evening was so much fun; with simple card games that we had forgotten were so exciting—or maybe we were just on a God-high!
We held Sunday School for big kids before the church service on the last day and then had lunch at the church. It seemed like everyone felt as fulfilled from the weekend’s events as I did. The happiness I felt was so much bigger than me that I knew it could only come from God. All of my unsettled feelings about direction and motivation in Christian Science had completely vanished. They’d been replaced with a confidence in my ability to conquer any challenge that may present itself. The “slump” I had been experiencing was gone!
I now have new ideas and inspiration about how to live my faith daily. I had expected the weekend to be a good experience, but (as He normally does) God amazed me with a glorious healing that resulted in a strong sense of peace! I am so excited to take my inspiration and see where my spiritual journey in Christian Science will take me.
Ps 10:17
Lord, thou hast heard the desire of the humble: thou wilt prepare their heart, thou wilt cause thine ear to hear:
I love those bursts of spiritual energy that get us out of those “slumps”. It’s exciting–like you’ve got a fire under you!
Thanks for your blog.
Whoop! I loved the weekend too–especially getting some quality time with other CS’ers. I felt before the weekend like I needed some inspiration. Sometimes I get on a plateau when it comes to my faith and I need that one thought or conversation or healing to make me feel on track again. My mom’s teacher always said that when we reach those “slumps” we should go straight to the Bible. I think he couldn’t be more right!
What blesses one, blesses all…by working with God to overcome your reluctance of your talk and the GAD and allowing Him to give you the right words and sense of peace that weekend, you not only were blessed but everyone else at the GAD I’m sure was blessed, too. Good doesn’t stop with one person but keeps going. Thanks for sharing, Holly. :o)
Hi, Holly, Thanks so much for sharing your experience of finding inspiration right where there seemed to be a “slump”. I liked the way you stayed alert even in the face of the suggestions of malaise, anxiety, and disinterest disguising themselves as your own voice! That was really good. It reminds me of another article which I reread recently from page 11 of the November 19, 2007 issue of the Christian Science Sentinel where Michael Zedlach writes: “By consistently keeping my thought focused on the truths I’ve learned in the Bible and SCIENCE AND HEALTH, my daily experience changes for the better. ….and especially this…”I’ve learned to pay more attention to what goes on in my thought than to what comes at me from outside circumstances. As it says in SCIENCE AND HEALTH, “Prayer cannot change the Science of being, but it tends to bring us into harmony with it.” (p.2)” That keeping our attention on our own thought really stood out to me as how it all works in unison for good. Too often I think we “hold our breath” anticipating how to deal with something coming at us when, holding to who God and His child ARE, has an infinite and ever renewing capacity to inspire us and refresh our thoughts and actions. Not that it is easy always to reverse one’s thinking but it certainly is readily available to us and sized to scale uniquely for each individual. I found your experience personally healing and applicable. Again, many thanks for unselfishly sharing.
Thank you for some inspiration!