How to feel better about yourself — no matter what!

by Inge Schmidt

Ask anyone who knows me, and they’ll probably confirm that clothing and fashion are not high on my list of priorities. If it’s comfortable and looks reasonably decent, I’ll wear it for years.

But after Christmastime, thanks to a few generous relatives, I found myself with some money to spend, and I was actually looking forward to an afternoon of shopping. Christmas had been wonderful; lots of time with family and friends, tons of laughter, and a fair amount of time spent reflecting on a year of significant spiritual growth. I was filled with an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the spiritual gifts and goodness I had received. Even the idea of an over-crowded, post-Christmas rush shopping mall, usually one of my least favorite places, couldn’t wipe the smile off my face. Or so I thought.

I walked through store after store, taking armfuls of clothing into a series of dressing rooms. And I found nothing.

Even worse, standing in front of those skewed dressing room mirrors with glaring harsh lights, I began to see less and less that I liked about me. Too pudgy there. Too tight here. Bad hair day. Disproportionate here. And just plain funny looking there. It seemed like I came out of every dressing room feeling a little bit uglier than when I went in.

By the end of the afternoon, I left the mall not only empty-handed, but discouraged and upset. I had been given this generous gift, that was supposed to meet a very practical need, but here I was feeling anything but grateful. Worse yet, I felt ridiculous. How could I be so upset about something as silly as an unsuccessful shopping trip?

As I drove home from the mall, I did what I always do when I find myself upset and without control of my own thinking: I turned myself over to God. I knew that just finding the right clothing wasn’t going to bring back the sense of true joy I had been feeling earlier that afternoon. Sure, I still needed some new clothes. But what I needed more was a sense of true beauty, spiritual beauty, eternal beauty.

Gradually, those self-deprecating thoughts I’d had in the stores were replaced with questions. What is beauty? What is beautiful to God? How do I express spiritual beauty?

When I got home, I began to do some research. I went online to dictionary.com and found that beautiful is defined as “having qualities that give great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, and think about.” Well, if I was interested in spiritual beauty, then I had to reason from God’s perspective. What is it that gives God great pleasure or satisfaction to see, hear, and think about? Immediately, I thought about the account of Jesus’ transfiguration in the Bible (see Matthew 17). At the end of this encounter, God, speaking about Christ Jesus, announces: “This is my beloved Son, in whom I am well pleased.” It was a clear answer to my question: it is man—all men, women, and children—who gives God great pleasure and satisfaction to see, hear, and think about. Man’s very essence and being is beautiful to God. A sense of peace and calm washed over me as I took in this idea. But I still had farther to go on my journey. I wanted to know what it meant to express beauty.

I stayed on my computer and using Concord, I looked up references that included “beautiful” in the Bible, Science and Health, and Prose Works by Mary Baker Eddy. A story in the Bible caught my attention. In the book of Acts, there is a well-known account of Peter and John healing a lame man (see Acts 3). Peter and John are on their way into the temple and a lame man asks them for alms, for some spare change. They ask the man to look on them, and he does so, probably expecting to receive a hand out. But they do better. They command the man to rise up and walk, and he does—completely and totally healed. He enters with them into the temple walking, leaping, and praising God.

One tiny detail stood out to me that I had never paid attention to before when reading this story: The gate to the temple where the healing took place was named Beautiful. Why did that matter to the story?

Fortunately, God, being omnipotent Mind, Love, never leaves any unanswered questions! I remembered that in the Glossary in Science and Health with Key to the Scriptures, the definition Mary Baker Eddy gives for temple is “Body; the idea of Life, substance, and intelligence; the superstructure of Truth.” I realized that the basis of beauty isn’t a material body—it’s the idea of Life, substance, and intelligence, “the superstructure of Truth”—it was above ground, or evident and plain to see.

With this insight came quite the spiritual reality check. Was I, metaphorically speaking, lamed by material thinking, looking for riches from something outside myself? Just like the story in Acts, the gate to beauty was right there with me. Man’s very being is that spiritual temple which is naturally beautiful—the perfect embodiment of Christ, fully expressing the beauty of holiness. But are we entering into that temple—embracing our spiritual identity as perfect and beautiful in consciousness—worshipping, leaping, and praising God?

In all my excitement to go shopping, I had lost sight of who I really was as the child of God, and as a result, began to feel outside His care, looking for material satisfaction instead of worshiping my spiritual goodness. But as I embraced man’s spiritual identity—my spiritual identity—I, too, began to leap and praise God.

Just like the lame man in Acts, I was lifted out of my paralyzed state, under the seeming barrage of mortal thought, and freed to see the spiritual reality that was all around me. Free to celebrate that I was God’s beloved daughter, in whom He was well pleased.

Later that week, I went out shopping again. This time, I did find clothes that I love. But I went into the store already clothed in the beauty of holiness, celebrating my spiritual identity, which is forever beautiful. As a result, I came out satisfied—not by pretty pieces of fabric, but by spiritual understanding and confidence.

With the holidays recently past, and a new year beginning, I hear so much talk of dieting and adopting a new sense of style. But the true temple, our spiritual body, is right there for each one of us, and it really is beautiful. Each one of us has the right to worship in that beautiful temple. Even better, we each have the Christly authority Peter and John expressed. We can lift ourselves and our neighbors out of material thinking so we’re ready to behold the beauty of holiness expressed in every individual. And we can all worship and leap and praise God together—rejoicing that we are His beloved sons and daughters, confident that He is well pleased!

This entry was posted on Monday, January 7th, 2008 at 3:14 pm and is filed under Self-esteem. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response.